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Sibling Relationships

“Some relationships  are like Tom & Jerry. They tease each other, knock down each other, irritate each other, but can’t live without each other.”

The relationship between the siblings is a very crucial and long – lasting relationship. Our siblings; brothers and sister, be they from the same parents or of our uncles and aunts, play a very powerful role in our development. There are several psychological researches where it is proven that siblings can shape each other’s personalities. By watching and listening to siblings, children strengthen their communication skills. Most research shows that there are at least five types of sibling relationships.

  • Intimate – extremely devoted
  • Congenial – close and caring and friendly
  • Loyal – maintain regular contact
  • Apathetic – not connected
  • Hostile – based on resentment and anger

Of these types, the healthiest adult sibling relationships are either congenial or loyal. Viewing our siblings as close friends and having family loyalty can come in handy as we get older and our social circle shrinks. Many older adults find sibling relationships satisfying and reliable. Just like any other relationship, in sibling relationship too we need to invest in terms of time and emotions to strengthen it. So today through this medium I am sharing some of the handy ways which can nurture your relationship with your brothers and sisters.

  1. The most important thing to now nurture the relationship with siblings is stop bringing past in to the present again and again. Childhood is like Vegas; let what happened there stay there only. Also don’t even guilt yourself for whatever you had done in the past. Hug, make up and enjoy now.
  2. Mind your manner as well as your business. One need not be formal, but a petty comment still rankles, no matter how close we are. Also avoid digging your nose in everything. Respect the privacy of your sibling.
  3. Stay confidential, if your sibling is sharing something with you don’t leak it out everywhere not even to the parents till it’s something very risky and must be told to someone concerned.
  4. Occasional hours- long chats are nice, but you are likely to super charge your bond by having frequent casual contact. Technology can be of help here. Text messaging, commenting on face book updates make it really easy to be the thoughtful sibling you are.
  5. Be nice to your sibling’s friends. It’s alright if you don’t have much liking for them, still don’t criticize them and just never be rude to them.
  6. Quite being jealous of other people’s sibling relationships. Remember, through, that there are different depths to each bond and that somewhere inside that group hug, someone is usually dropping an elbow. So don’t compare and see what you and your siblings can do to nurture your bond.
  7. Accept the changes; individuals change and so does the relationships. There is nothing good and bad about it. So try to be flexible towards there changes.
  8. Be nice to each other’s spouse. And take it seriously; never-never-ever insult each other’s spouses. Though you can of course gossip about them.
  9. Avoid hot-button topics like politics, religious etc. It sounds like common sense but too many of us don’t follow it and find ourselves at debates.
  10. Stay out of family drama. Stay neutral on any issues that could affect your relationship with your sibling. And never gossip to other family members about the problems your sibling is having because that just adds more fuel to the fire.

So, my dear brothers and sisters go ahead and add new spark in this lovely relationship. HAVE HAPPY SIBLING

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